Burn the Koran! Whatever you do, don't offend the poor peaceful Muslims. They are protected under the law for some reason or the other. Let's be totally politically correct here.
Maybe they are actually really nice people. Kind to women and children and tolerant of all nationalities and other religions. That punishment of 90 lashes and stoning is very fine for a woman who has shown her face in public. The bitch asked for it. Don't you agree that we should protect the muslims, allow them to burn symbols of the USA and encourage freedom of expression?
This is the kind of advertising that was prevalent during WWII. We are fighting a war right? The enemy is "Them" right? So what if we offend somebody. We should be killing them, with kindness maybe? Not. FTW.
This is America. We are the most powerful country in the world. Ever. We are allowed to offend anybody we want to. We can take over countries and give them back. We shouldn't get pushed around. Go ahead and burn any symbol you want, you are an American. Burning draft cards was a temporary sensation. The bra burning thing was great too. They burned all kinds of books and even set fire to all those ugly witches in Massachusetts. Personally I am totally relieved that epidemic was stopped in it's tracks before those nasty Salem Witches could take off and start breeding all over the place.
We should stop acting like such pussies right away. All we need to do is blow the living daylights out of any location we even suspect may be harboring terrorists, rebels or whatever. The people running away from the bad guys would be a dead give away. They know that we won't blow up a school. That becomes a good place to use as headquarters. Bullshit. Reagan parked an aircraft carrier offshore and dropped a few bombs in Omar Kadafi's back yard. That shut him up for 25 years. That kind of negotiating works.
We should stop acting like such pussies right away. All we need to do is blow the living daylights out of any location we even suspect may be harboring terrorists, rebels or whatever. The people running away from the bad guys would be a dead give away. They know that we won't blow up a school. That becomes a good place to use as headquarters. Bullshit. Reagan parked an aircraft carrier offshore and dropped a few bombs in Omar Kadafi's back yard. That shut him up for 25 years. That kind of negotiating works.
I know how to win this war; Build a great big electric plant. Start broadcasting TV, hook all the kids up to Wii and iPods. Park everybody in front of a great big TV set and turn on Real World, Jersey Shore and Gerry Springer. Crank up the air in the homes and make it intolerable to go outside. Fill the youth of that country with sugary drinks, carbohydrates and give away free cigarettes. Be aware of all the pictures you see from the middle east. No wonder these people are angry. Of course they are pissed off, they live in terrible conditions! Dust all over the place, no ice, definitely no martinis and you can probably forget all about limes or olives. How about a supermarket, nice cool shower and a FEMA trailer from Louisiana left over from Katrina? 
Supply them with Ramen noodles, Easy Mac and white bread. They NEED McDonalds too. How about some plumbing? They would go for an actual toilet upon which they could sit. A few Corvettes spread out to the natives who become narcs wouldn't hurt either. After a few months of advertising we could escalate to total warfare. Bring in NASCAR, Coors light and maybe a golf course here and there. Pick up the trash, bulldoze the hovels we see on TV.
Resistance is futile, you will be assimilated.
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